Marc Maron in conversation with Jason Segel: On discontent when things couldn't possibly be better

PODCAST: WTF with Marc Maron Podcast: Episode 623 - Jason Segel

Actor Jason Segel in conversation with Comedian Marc Maron discusses the persistent feeling of discontent even when things are going as good as they could be. Particularly poignant as Jason quietly battled alcoholism whilst seemingly hitting his stride in Hollywood. Similarly Marc Maron built a career as a comic's comic who never found mainstream success. The early episodes of his now seminal WTF podcast highlighting his struggle with having close "famous" friends, craving recognition whilst having a perpetually peripheral experience of success. Over 300+ episodes it has tracked Marc's conversion from frustrated marginal genius to arguably the Godfather of modern comedy, recently being the first to record a full podcast with a sitting American President.

Jason Segel describes the affinity he shared with author David Foster Wallace who he plays in his latest movie 'End of the Tour' (2015), as well as the interviewer he plays against David Lipsky as embodied by Jesse Eisenberg.

WTF with Marc Maron Podcast: Episode 623 - Jason Segel
SEGEL: The themes of the movie really resonated with me. Its a lot about what we're talking about, outside the comedy about actually being the person. What happens when things are going as well as they possibly can and you still feel the same? This movie ['The End of the Tour'] takes place over the last 4 days, its about David Foster Wallace. Its the last 4 days of the 'Infinite Jest' book tour, its called the voice of a generation, it came out and did as well it could do. He didn't feel better...

VIDEO: 'The End of the Tour' trailer (2015)

On what we're looking for

JESSE EISENBERG: (1h 06m 25s) That was the lens I saw it through, a guy talking to himself on the beginning end of a tunnel. Lipsky is looking up at David Foster Wallace saying "God it must be great to be you? You must feel great? You must feel terrific? What's it like to be so famous?" and David Foster Wallace looking back at him saying "Kid, be careful what you wish for. If you get to where I am you're not going to feel better
MARC MARON: And that's sad
SEGEL: Yeah its sad but its very real and I actually think that one of the reasons David Foster Wallace resonates with people is that he's a man who had the vocabulary to express something that we all feel and maybe are too scared to talk about openly
MARON: Which is? The existential loneliness that persists
SEGEL: Yeeeeah, you're promised by our culture that if you achieve X, Y or Z of if you obtain X, Y or Z or watch this marathon of 'Real Housewives' that you're going to feel better and it turns out that its not true and people are really operating on that assumption and get to that destination and find out its vacant
MARON: But its rare that a person can investigate that loneliness like he did, sadly most people percolate along with a mild feeling of dissatisfaction and anxiety that they can't pinpoint but he decided to explore the underpinnings of existence in relation to these expectations and the onslaught of sensations available 

On Life imitating art

MARC MARON: (1h) ... This character, how close to your experience was it?
JASON SEGEL: At this point in my life, it felt like kismet... I had gotten sober 2 and a half years ago. I'm a year and a half sober at that point, my TV show was coming to an end and I was in a real moment of "What do I do now?". There's a line in the movie that is kinda verbatim from what David Foster Wallace said in this interview - "I have to face the reality now of being 34 years old alone in a room with a piece of paper" and that's what I felt at this point. My safety net was gone. The fact I had a financial safety net didn't really apply to what I felt.
MARON: It doesn't, does it?
SEGEL: No, of course not. Well not "of course not". I suppose from looking outside of it you would think "Of course it does".
MARON: It actually makes it [worse], for a lot of people "What are you complaining about?". But the truth of the matter is, the sad thing when you're in that position is that you do have that and you have these feelings and they're almost compounded. Then you're like "WTF is wrong with me? I can eat wherever I want and I can buy that car if I want to".
SEGEL: This is what the movie is to me, in my opinion. What the movie is, its basically a transcript of this interview that a guy called David Lipsky did with David Foster Wallace where 'Rolling Stone' sent him out to spend the last 4 days of the book tour with him.
MARON: What I noticed about this movie in retrospect is, who is this movie really about?...
SEGEL: I actually think its about a feeling that if you treat yourself (and listen to a speech that David Foster Wallace gave called 'This is Water', its a Kenyon Commencement Speech). It is addressing the exact thing we're talking about in this interview which is Where do you place your value and what is going to address this itch that we keep trying to scratch that's telling us we're not there? That we're not enough. If its success, you'll never be successful enough. If its money, you'll never have enough money. If its talent, you'll never be adored enough. You have to find something else and I just really related to that.

We all go through it no matter how big you are

SEGEL: (1h 17m 30s) No matter how well you're doing, you're going to have feelings about not being enough. You're going to have feelings of dissatisfaction and its tough to find people to talk about that with if, People are all the same if you basically sound like you're whining.
MARON: Or you're seen as the guy who should have everything. You have to have real friends is basically what it is.
SEGEL: Its codified in myth since the beginning of time, this is a Universal feeling. The King feels the same way
MARON: And who's going to feel bad for the king? F*ck that guy. He's the King!

'The Secret Life of Walter Mitty': Ben Stiller on hyperreality and losing yourself in the moment

Australia's Movie Guy, Marc Fennell dubbed 'The Secret Life of Walter Mitty' as "the best 2 hour Travel Agent ad you've ever seen". So its only fitting that I found this Ben Stiller feature on the Delta Airlines inflight magazine 'Sky'.

Delta Airlines' Magazine 'Sky' (December 2013): The Ben Stiller Magic

The profile written by a forgivably gushy Steve Marsh, injects some psychoanalysis of Ben Stiller

The Ben Stiller Magic
Stiller, at least in the movies he directs, has always seemed obsessed with reality --specifically with how reality is shaped (or warped) by the stuff we watch when we’re on the couch... 

"So why are you so interested in this notion of reality? It seems like your entire career has been obsessed with this idea."
"Wow," Stiller says. "I never really analyzed it. That’s interesting you say that, because I’ve never thought about it that way." He pauses.

As someone drawn to Dreams and Reality this was right up my alley.

I ask him if he ever daydreams. "No, not really," he says. "When you're making a movie like this, or any movie really, you're so in the moment, you’re not really daydreaming. But I do try to take time to appreciate the experience of doing things you wouldn't normally get to do."

He remembers one moment on the set of Mitty: "This wasn't really a daydream, but it was just kind of a moment of realization. I was in the water and we had to do a shot where the Zodiac boat is approaching me to pull me out of the water, and the only way we could get the shot was to put the camera in the boat, because it's like a POV of the boat coming at me. We were a mile or half a mile out to sea in the ocean off Iceland, and the swells were pretty big, so they dropped me in the water and just drove away. It was just a funny, surreal moment. Cause I'm really in the ocean here by myself. I couldn't see anything; the boat went far enough away that it was gone, the swells were at four feet. And I was like, This is crazy, this is actually... this is happening. I'm really in the ocean. If that boat doesn't come back... I mean, I know they know I'm here but... It's like the funny crossover of reality and movies, where you do real things but somehow you think because you're doing it for a movie that everything is OK. And, actually, the weird thing that you're doing is as dangerous or weird as it would be if there was no camera there; you're still really doing it." 

Whether its an Astronaut going about his routine or a backpacker off to his next destination there is an element of being outside yourself that is necessary to accomplish "extraordinary" things.

'The Secret Life of Walter Mitty' (2013)

Whilst walking around Cartagena I spotted this perch by the water. Not being scared of heights and with my fondness for climbing things I decided to scale it. I could be like a Pirate of the Caribbean.
Only at the top did I realise how precarious and foolish the endeavour was. What was I thinking?

From Below: Crow's Nest in Cartagena, Colombia

From above: Probably not the best idea 

We "get into the zone" or are under so much pressure we forget to appreciate the moment. When you're caught up in the moment or swept by momentum, things you never thought possible can be mundanely achieved.
We just have to remember not to appreciate them mundanely.

Apollo Robbins, master pickpocket featured in the New Yorker

I've often wondered why the things I'm most fascinated by are the things I should be most fearful of. I've always been drawn to charisma, psychology and manipulation. My most memorable encounter with it in real life was in Istanbul, Turkey when I was exposed to the "clip joint" scam. Now that I've been in South America a few months I've been alert to pickpockets. So far, only the sauce scam has been attempted on me;

I'd seen Apollo Robbins on one of my favourite shows, 'Brain Games' with Jason Silva but had never heard his full story until I found this interesting New Yorker article in a Porto Alegre hostel.

VIDEO: Apollo Robbins, The Master Pickpocket: Tricks of the Trade

A PICKPOCKET’S TALE: The spectacular thefts of Apollo Robbins
by Adam Green for The New Yorker
Recently, psychiatrists, neuroscientists, and the military have studied his methods for what they reveal about the nature of human attention. Teller, a good friend of Robbins’s, believes that widespread recognition is only a matter of time. “The popularity of crime as a sort of romantic thing in America is profoundly significant, and Apollo is tapping into that,” he told me. “If you think about it, magic itself has many of the hallmarks of criminal activity: You lie, you cheat, you try not to get caught—but it’s on a stage, it has a proscenium around it. When Apollo walks onstage, there’s a sense that he might have one foot outside the proscenium. He takes a low crime and turns it into an art form.

Francesca Borri on the disconnect in realities, at war and in peace

A brilliant existential piece by Italian freelance journalist Francesca Borri, describing the disconnect between the frontlines and the other ugencies of our comfortable realities.

Francesca Borri: The twisted reality of an Italian freelancer in Syria

Woman’s work
He finally wrote to me. After more than a year of freelancing for him, during which I contracted typhoid fever and was shot in the knee, my editor watched the news, thought I was among the Italian journalists who’d been kidnapped, and sent me an email that said: "Should you get a connection, could you tweet your detention?" 

That same day, I returned in the evening to a rebel base where I was staying in the middle of the hell that is Aleppo, and amid the dust and the hunger and the fear, I hoped to find a friend, a kind word, a hug. Instead, I found only another email from Clara, who’s spending her holidays at my home in Italy. She’s already sent me eight "Urgent!" messages. Today she’s looking for my spa badge, so she can enter for free. The rest of the messages in my inbox were like this one: "Brilliant piece today; brilliant like your book on Iraq." Unfortunately, my book wasn’t on Iraq, but on Kosovo.

Is Andrew W.K a persona that has been played by multiple actors? Marc Maron in conversation with Andrew W.K.

WTF with Marc Maron: Episode 313 - Andrew W.K.

I was once enthralled by an interesting conversation with Party Rocker Andrew W.K on Triple J radio, it struck me enough that I spent several days referencing it in conversations. During this time I was informed by someone who'd partied with the man that he was actually a persona that had been through several incarnations. He was merely a "mask", a legacy that could be donned by alternate actors. A motivational superhero, the proverbial masked wrestler except in plain sight.

As a wrestling fan and someone fascinated with identity this was an intriguing revelation. I wasn't even aware of such speculation, some cursory googling confirms there is credible baggage associated with Andrew W.K's identity. Personally it didn't change anything as I believe its "all real", if anything the hearsay only makes him more more compelling.

Interestingly an American artist I ran with in Barcelona offered the same theory for elusive artist 'Banksy' though I suspect his speculation came from a place of ignorance as he was mispronouncing his name as 'Banky'.

When Andrew W.K later appeared on Marc Maron's WTF podcast I listened to it through the prism that he was a Performance artist. In this light, I've pulled portions of the chat that allude to this likelihood. The episode is a largely typical WTF episode (existential, storytelling) but there was definitely some coded messaging going on. Either it was genuine or some playful improv to perpetuate a myth. Is the "Philosopher of Partying" a persona, judge for yourself.

Referencing "Soul" in relation to love and life

WTF with Marc Maron: Episode 313 - Andrew W.K.
MARC MARON: (22m 30s) I'm a true believer that the "One Soulmate" idea is bullshit
ANDREW W.K: For you?
MARON: For anybody
W.K: Geez Marc
MARON: What?
W.K: I wanna think that it exists
MARON: You're soul is so small it needs to limit itself?
W.K: Its extremely small, of course that's why I try to compensate for the other...
MARON: You're compensating for your tiny soul
laughter
W.K: I gave up my soul a looooong -- well not that long ago. About 12 years ago
MARON: To who?
W.K: When I moved to New York
MARON: You did not! You're full of soul. You're all about the soul
W.K: And that's the trick!
MARON: I get that. That IS the trick
W.K: You make them think it. Noooo there's no trickery going on. I'm having fun...

Maron crossing the line and breaking kayfabe

MARC MARON: (1h 04m 50s) Don't subvert your destiny
ANDREW W.K: You can
MARON: I think that what you're talking about is an example of being a creative person and realising your limitations and pursuing the best you can with your talent
W.K: I think you said it very well. I feel very limited so I was pleased to find one thing
MARON:  But you're not that limited. You've developed a theme, a tone and what appears to be a character for yourself
awkward air arises
W.K: Hey now!
MARON: What?
W.K: You see that sign? It says apple sauce. I'm just kidding it says "Applause". Will you flash that sign for me. You know what that is right?
Marc starts clapping and giggling
Remember the better you do, the better Larry does. Ok he's giving me a sign. He's giving me 5 seconds, its exciting isn't it? No no no...
the air normalises

Andrew W.K on his persona and being beholden to it

MARC MARON: (58m 40s) How do you get from this appreciation of the anarchists, the geniuses and the poets. How did you build yourself into what you became?
ANDREW W.K: I can't compete with them. They've already done it, they done a good job with all that they've done. That's just what I do for my own interests. My work that I do as Andrew W.K has nothing to do with my own tastes or hobbies or interests and things like that
MARON: Why is that?
W.K: Umm I guess its just with the agreements I made and the choices I made early on. It's not like its not a dream come true
MARON: What are those agreements though? You've probably talked about it before and I apologise
W.K: No no its the most trivial, unimportant stuff. Its just contracts and business things like that. What I'm saying is that when you know what you need to do and you signed up to do it and you know what it takes and what you've agreed to in order to achieve that. It not like I have a separate life. I don't look at it as a job, a 9 to 5 job
MARON: That is the business
W.K: I feel there's a time and place for it all. The Gods will continue to guide me and my managers, the people I work with in this version of reality will also guide me. I'm patient that's the thing
MARON: Do you have Gods? Do you have them for real or are you saying that?
W.K: Guardian angels, however you wanna put it.
MARON: Do you have them?
W.K: Everybody does. Well I do.
MARON: Well are you a spiritual cat?
W.K: No just pragmatic
MARON: Pragmatic and willing to mythologise
W.K: I can't discount these things with the life I've led. I feel it would be disrespectful to the forces beyond myself, to my mum and dad and my mentors. There are other things at work...

To be honest I was never much fussed on finding the absolute truth on whether Andrew W.K was a construct. I'm just delighted that the phenomenon exists. For those wondering if there's any larger meaning behind it all, Maron and W.K offer some clues in the beginning of their chat.

On art and life being esoteric and "making sense of it all"

ANDREW W.K: (16m) One of the most amazing things he [Professor] said, I don't just think it applies to esoteric thought It applies to maybe life, at least culture. "The fact you don't understand it is the point"
MARC MARON: Right! Cuz its constantly provocative
W.K: Its inspiring thought.
MARON: Exactly
W.K: Thank goodness cuz I felt like an idiot all these years that I didn't get it
MARON: That is very provocative... You spend your life trying to crack some sort of code thinking that, there's part of you that thinks like "I gotta make sense of it". How many times do you say to yourself "I just gotta figure it out
W.K: I wanna know!
MARON: I gotta figure it out. Someone knows!
W.K: Someday its all gonna make sense

Find other Marc Maron posts below:
- AV Club's Nathan Rabin talks about Podcast Culture on Marc Maron's 300th episode of WTF
- Actor, Writer and Traveler Mike White speaks to Marc Maron about Adventure
- Dan Harmon talks Television with Marc Maron on GT4: "Hamburger" Art and living in a "concrete, Orwellian Honeycomb"
- Is Andrew W.K a persona that has been played by multiple actors? Marc Maron in conversation with Andrew W.K.

Scams in Istanbul: The reality of trusting (3 of 3)

<< crossposted on 'The 30 Home Games' blog

Are your Spidey Senses tingling?

My mood definitely shifted, I became suspicious of everybody. I even began questioning the authenticity of my hostel roommate, a down-on-his-luck Canadian traveler borrowing money from newly made running mates. I knew I had to find a way to get out of this mental funk. Attention is a double-edged sword. Being a traveler, a lot of possibilities were opened because people were curious and drawn to me as an outsider. I was welcomed into homes and friend circles, now this attention was being used against me. I was afraid to go out, the simplest chores would be interrupted by the constant initiation of conversation. I imagine this is the reality celebrities and hotties live in every day.

My running mate who escaped the scam unscathed was someone I befriended on the trip from Goreme to Istanbul. We bonded over our love of basketball, he was a diehard Laker fan and former intern for the team. We played a game with locals at the courts in the Nike Beyoğlu store the morning after his ordeal as he briefed me on what happened. I had my epiphany, I would convert scammer invitations into a game of hoops. It dovetailed with my 30 Home Games mission, my quest for a Basketball experience in each Country. He was skeptical, it was asking for trouble.

The genius of these scams are that they're only asking for your time. Its essentially rapport building through good conversation, a few shared drinks which sets the table for the manipulation to take place. Its only when the betrayal happens at the Clip-joint that one begins to question everything. A fellow traveler equated it to a relationship break up, especially one dissolved through infidelity. We start tracing its history, which parts were real? Was any of it genuine? Then we start looking inward, was it my fault for believing? I figured I could entice them to a game of basketball during what they thought was the "real" part.

The following few days I was upbeat, returning to my old self. Instead of shooing people away grumpily, I was looking forward to interactions but surprisingly the attention had waned. I can't pinpoint whether it was my change in energy, my familiarity or random chance. Interestingly I had begun to mutually greet one of the scammers like Ralph Wolf and Sam Sheepdog would in the cartoons. He was a fellow in a blue/green puffer jacket I would regularly cross paths with, usually alongside a new Asian tourist. Our original encounter he tried to open me at Sultanahmet with the line "Hey you look like Michael Jackson".

In the closing days of my fortnight in Istanbul I did manage to find a genuine connection, befriending young artists at a Jazz bar. Over several days we hit the town, was welcomed into homes for dinner and tea and got to crash at a few places. The locals were understandably removed from this reality, they explained that some Current affair shows had shed some light on the scams in Istanbul. As it was a crime of opportunity, Turks from the east unfamiliar with the big city were also being scammed. Most attention was paid to non-Turks because they were ideal targets, distinct, lucrative and crucially - naive.

The charming person I spent most of the time with mindblowingly did her major thesis on 'Hyperreality' - a pet topic of mine. On my final day I was welcomed into her friend's apartment, we discussed scamming and reality as we smoked and drank in their attic. Their roommate, a Syrian revolutionary taking refuge in Turkey arrived late into the evening. He began in the front lines for the cause but decided his powers were best served in media relations. He weighed in on the conversation by showing videos he'd filmed that day presenting two versions of reality for the same event, one for dissemination now and the other truth to be released after the revolution was won. 

It was a memorable way to close my experience in Turkey and it gave me a sobering take on the scamming experience. I've always been fascinated by the power of charisma and the bending of reality but this underlined for me that its ultimately playing with fire. My running mate who escaped the scam had himself conceded, "As bad as it could have turned out, it'll likely go down as the most interesting that happens on this trip".

During this time creating genuine experiences with amazing new friends, the basketball mouse trap was the furthest thing from my mind. I never did get to hoop it up with a scammer, I didn't even come close to as invitations had dried up. I'm still intrigued by the prospect of holding court with a scammer but the idea served its purpose as it shifted my mood and I found the genuine experience I was searching for. I'll file it as 'Incomplete' and still hope to achieve it if I ever return to Istanbul. If someone is able to execute it on my behalf I would love to hear your story.

After a great evening capping off my time and saying my goodbyes the morning after, I had one final rude awakening. As I checked in at Atatürk International Airport the teller informed I wasn't in the system for any flights that day. I scanned my ticket, checked my phone everything seemed fine. It was then I realised that my Calendar settings were set to 2011. My Turkish friend had borrowed my phone 5 days earlier to use her SIM, I must've mistakenly applied the wrong settings when I turned it back on so the dates corresponded to the wrong days. I had been operating a day in advance this whole time, my flight was actually for tomorrow.
Everything is real until the moment it isn't.

- Scams in Istanbul: Why I trust people (1 of 3)
- Scams in Istanbul: Why people trust others (2 of 3)
- Scams in Istanbul: The reality of trusting (3 of 3)

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The folks at IndieTravelPodcast have a comprehensive discussion on several possible scams travelers might encounter - Indie Travel Podcast Ep 212: Travel Scams, cons and Travel safety

Have you ever been scammed whilst traveling? Has your sense of reality ever been shaken?

Does it matter that the dramatic ending to ARGO wasn't "real"

Bob motivating the only holdout to actioning the daring escape plan
JOE STAFFORD: It's suicide.
TONY MENDEZ: I'm asking you to trust me.
STAFFORD: I don't trust you.
BOB ANDERS: This is the game, Joe. What world are you living in?
STAFFORD: What world am I...? The one where they're hanging people from construction cranes, Bob! It's too dangerous, I don't want to bring my wife into this.
- Argo (2012)

'Argo' (2012) "The movie was fake. The mission was real."

Ben Affleck's latest directorial effort 'Argo' is gaining Oscar buzz but some are tempering their praise as the dramatic 3rd act was heavily exaggerated to ratchet up the drama for moviegoers. Its only fitting as the movie is about the intoxicating nature of cinema, an antidote to the tragedy and absurdity of real life.

Travers: 'Argo' Is Terrific Despite Hollywood Exaggerations 
Ben Affleck political thriller twists history
Though he stays loyal to history for much of the film, Affleck takes some liberties and spices up the ending. "There's no doubt that Argo is a terrific movie. You sit there and you're entertained, you're crazy... you're on the edge of your seat," says Travers. "But is it right that in order to make a movie that would entertain us, you would fake the truth of something that stayed historically accurate through the whole beginning, right up to the 80 percent mark?" If Affleck gets an Oscar nod, does he deserve to lose because he "faked the truth at the end"?

Futurist Jason Silva offers his perspective which leans towards cutting Director Ben Affleck some slack for using his creative license for 'Argo'.

VIDEO: Jason Silva on ecstasy and how "real" it needs to be

JASON SILVA: The cinema, the art breaks through the screen, it literally breaks through the screen and becomes real. In me, in the audience, in the viewer and its this idea that its ALL real. William Gibson says "We'll look back at the past and laugh at the so called distinction between the real and virtual worlds"...

Jake the Snake on getting what you want and still not being satisfied

Wrestling legend Jake "The Snake" Roberts talks about temptation on the road and manages to make the coolest thing ever sound like the most depressing thing ever. Be careful what you wish for.

VIDEO: Beyond the Mat (5 of 10)

Beyond the Mat (1999)
JAKE ROBERTS: (8m 24s) The road really screwed up my sex life at home man. You go on the road, you get some type of fame or whatever. All of a sudden you can have it everyday, then all of a sudden you wanna get selective. Then all of a sudden one a day's not enough so you do two a day, then three a day. Then two at a time, then two at a time with toys, then two at a time but just watch. Then it gets more bizarre and more bizarre and it finally gets to the point that when you go home and try to make love to your wife - Ain't no way. Ain't no way because the mental stimulation is not there and that's bad. That's bad.

Scams in Istanbul: Why people trust others (2 of 3)

<< crossposted on The '30 Home Games' and 'LozinTranslation' blog

VIDEO: "Do You Trust Me?" (♫ A Whole New World ♫) - Aladdin (1992)

During my weakest point in Istanbul, I would think of this famous Disney clip and amuse myself by humming 'A Whole New World'. My intent shifted from sarcasm to optimism.

--------------------------------------------

This is a cautionary tale. I myself have never been scammed in the following way. My brother was scammed in similar fashion in China (Tea Ceremony scam) and my good German friend experienced another variation in Malaysia (blackjack scam). My American running mate in Istanbul ran through the complete course taking 5hrs total. Fortunately he escaped unscathed, no standover men forcing him to the ATM. I joke that his scammer was in a 'Jules Winnfield-like 'transitional period' and just let him go. The "clip-joint" scam is explained below

The Single Male Scam
One of these is the "Let's Have a Drink" Scam which results in your paying a drinks bill of hundreds or even thousands of dollars or euros... While you wander around on your own in the evening, you're approached by a well-dressed man who speaks good English. He chats with you, then he suggests you have a drink together, and leads you to a bar or nightclub that's in on the scam.

VIDEO: Scam City | Istanbul - Scammed at Night, the Police Don't Care | Free Documentary 

Below are a sample of the dozen interactions I experienced, these examples on their own shouldn't raise any red flags but do illustrate the variety of scripts. Most of these stories happen from 4pm onwards, as it approaches dark. I am dressed casually (hoodie, trackpants, no bags/camera) and all my interactions began with approaches in English, inexplicably they would say “Sorry, I thought you were Turkish“.

Just like making a sale or attracting a partner - the routine is about triggering certain human behaviours

Appearance: Young, Mobile phone in ear
Location: Sultanahmet Square, walking alongside
Story: Kurdish man on holidays from Antalya
Approach: (Phone in ear) "Excuse me which one is Hagia Sophia and which one is the Blue Mosque?"

Appearance: Older, Very well dressed
Location: Galata köprüsü (main walkbridge with fishermen), In my path then stops suddenly to enjoy the view with me
Approach: "How far down do you think it is?"

Appearance: Young, dressed for going out
Location: Taksim Beyoğlu
Story: Visiting Istanbul from Izmir, staying at a hostel
Approach: "We are staying at x Hostel... they suggested this bar worth checking out"

Scams are a subversion of the ordinary interactions we have in daily life. Preying on our better nature, they are most effective when they address a want or a need. Scammers see these as 'vulnerabilities'. When our house is on fire, its reasonable to trust the first person we see with a uniform and hose.

When the want or a need is a "free lunch" or something sexual, it's understandable why others would be unsympathetic but more often than not the wants are innocent. In the case of the Istanbul clip-joint scams, it could be a yearning for good company, seeking a local connection or just an interesting night out. A scammer is a 'man with a plan', they target wayward travellers offering direction and directions.

I like to travel with an open mind and have found that all my best experiences in life involve me trusting in others. Most new relationships and experiences are founded on this principle, we use our value systems to balance risk vs reward then we make instinctual decisions. On-the-street interactions is how I arrived at many of my best experiences traveling. I didn't want to lose this aspect of my journey. This episode certainly made me more mindful and more grateful of the good fortune I'd had up to this point.

Everyday people are being scammed. Tourists are soft targets because they often stick out and are often more trusting. Looking through forums discussing travel scams I've found people tend to break down into these types:
1) Victims - ranging from philosophical to vengeful
2) Cautious know-it-alls
3) Defensive locals

Instead of depriving myself of a great Turkish experience (which I did find) because I was afraid of unwanted attention, I instead calibrated my state of mind. The more I reflect on this time, the more I realise how human the experience was. As an adventurous person by nature, I would have been perfect fodder for this scam thankfully things transpired differently. I found myself fascinated and obsessed with this stomach-turning game, it was when I read this that everything changed:

CAREFUL: SCAM in Istanbul...
... My guy was very well dressed and well spoken, when I told him I was just going to check my email and then return to my hotel because I was tired, he said he also needed to find a net-cafe and Skype his family (he told me he was a business man from out of town !) and he even paid for my net use. I even got to say hello to his wife and child, so how could I suspect a lovely family guy ? Anyway, much the same as everyone else...
- BP007

Enter Basketball...

- Scams in Istanbul: Why I trust people (1 of 3)
- Scams in Istanbul: Why people trust others (2 of 3)
- Scams in Istanbul: The reality of trusting (3 of 3)

Scams in Istanbul: Why I trust people (1 of 3)

<< crossposted on The '30 Home Games' and 'LozinTranslation' blog

"The best adventures are when you trust somebody"

- paraphrased quote entered into a running mate's phone

The third week into my Turkey experience and I was in snow-covered Göreme. It was a foggy day. I was eavesdropping on an exchange between a Tour operator and a representative for a busload of tourists. The owner of the nearby horseranch came out and we chatted about the unreasonable expectations people have. "If you come to Turkey in Winter be prepared for snow" he began. "It doesn't matter that it was sunny last week in Dubai. Today you're in Turkey". We connected, he invited me inside where it was warmer.

I hung around for about 5 hours. He commanded a staff of 6 or so of varying ages and experience. They came in and out and we talked about the usual - girls, dreams and life. One associate had been living in Japan for 2 years, it was his second day back in Turkey. He confided that he had a miserable time there but he loves his newborn son and his Japanese wife (they met when she was a tourist). He had a lot of thinking to do. We drank Raki and Efes beer, had kebab eats and smoked.

I mentioned my time in Turkey has been more scenic than social. These are the types of interactions I value and what I've enjoyed most about how I travel. Having had difficulty finding it in Turkey, I cherished this experience all the more.

Its ultimately what connects me to a place - being accepted or feeling like I belong in some way. The ranchowner described the feeling like a mirror, "we tend to like things when we can see ourselves in it" . The ranchowner commended me on my openness, the feeling was mutual. I explained that all my best experiences and adventures have come with an exchange of trust. Strangers off the street, Couchsurfers have welcomed me into their lives and homes. As a stranger I've been welcomed into classrooms and house parties and been handed house keys from people I've just met.

Times I've trusted in others and vice versa:
- CouchSurfing: I've accompanied Latvians as they've delivered flowers to beloved former teachers and been escorted to a wrestling show by scooter in Germany.
- Strangers met on Lithuanian streets have invited me to parasail and pick mushrooms
- Gone on road trips and slept in unfurnished apartments with new friends
- I was an honorary Student at the SpoHo in Köln. I ate at the Mensa, went on their socials and participated in classes
- Had amazing meals in Portugal through the kindness of strangers
- I surrender myself each time I Ego Trip

We tried to figure out why two strangers could be so trusting so quickly. The Ranchowner offered "When your soul is naked, people can recognise". Its just my nature, I have faith in people and my 'Spidey Sense' has served me well.

Enter Istanbul...
- Scams in Istanbul: Why I trust people (1 of 3)
- Scams in Istanbul: Why people trust others (2 of 3)
- Scams in Istanbul: The reality of trusting (3 of 3)